The Art of Relations – What It Takes to be a Good Partner and a Friend

No dog in the world consider an ordinary devotion as something unusual. However, often people come to extol feelings of a dog as a feat only because not all of them have a devotion to duty and faithfulness to a friend as the roots of life,  as the natural foundation of the beings, when the nobility of the soul is a-matter-of-fact granted state. (G.Troepolsky, “White Bim Black Ear”)

We, people, need to learn to balance relations, love and friendship. And this is a path to wisdom. Indeed, relationship is an art of balance between several extremes. Therefore, all the advice here is ambiguous and rather gives direction to relying on the wisdom to find a middle ground.

And most of the problems occur in the relationship because of the selfishness and unwillingness to put ourselves in a place of a partner!

Long-term relationship is a school of self-development and upbringing of an individual!

Human relationships provide a fertile ground for a personal development of two people united by a single bond.

To be ready for a relationship, first of all, we must be a right person to ourselves. First and foremost we need take responsibility for everything that happens and what we do. There is no point in whining and feeling sorry for oneself when things go astray.

We need to engage ourselves in business; earn money and do something good for society in general. As a result, there won’t be time to complain about our circumstances. Cynicism suggests that all that is positive sells better.

Relationship is to create oneself as a joyful, happy, beautiful, healthy, and productive personality.

Partners evolve together, — not at the expense of one another. Complete dissolution into an object of love, renunciation of self-interest in favor of partner’s interests is a universal rake. We need to create and recreate ourselves again and again; deal with our “peculiarities” and replace them with qualities that we like better practicing conscious approach.

Self-development in relations is a process of conscious purification. – To be a good partner, – we need to be always happy; be physically in good health. And most importantly, we must be able to control our emotions. Self-control makes us strong and strong-willed.

All of us have the ability to love, so we start a relationship so quickly and easily. The difficulty lies when we need to develop the capacity to allow to love oneself and to be loved. We need to learn to accept and maintain affective relationships. If an ability to be loved is poorly developed, it is virtually impossible for a person to put himself or herself in a place of a loved one and to understand his or her expectations and needs.

“Love is a crystal glass: if you will hold it too easy,  it will slip out and break; if you hold it too hard and squeeze, it will crack and crush”, – tells us Eastern wisdom.

This area is a secret of a heart: a heart always feels a sharpness of a moment and picks necessary means. In fact, it is a great mystery what unites the two.

Really it is possible only to reach up to a free consciousness. In a case, if a man wants his wife back, he can choose bold, proactive approach; but a woman in a such situation shall be extremely cautious in her choice of means. Her approach and actions likely require delicacy, gentleness, and kindness.

When a woman shows excessive activity, it could be very annoying for a man. Men’s natural defense mechanism is triggered, because a man himself, by definition, performs an “active” role, and when he feels aggression and chasing form a woman, his instinct pushes him to run away.

We always have to strive for relationship. Universe does not simply connects two people, so dismiss and tear firmly relations will be not the best way. Anything that the universe originally once united, a person can not divide; so love, coming to a heart once, remains there forever. However, we need an enormous strength to be able to properly pass through the cooling situations and conflicts – to be able to draw the right conclusions and make the correct decisions. Relationship as well as friendship is a part of our souls. And it often occurs that a crises lead to welfare; – so people are cleansed, changed for the better, passing through the fire of trials to connect in a new way.

We can not over-expose a truth to one another. It is necessary to delicately refer to the past and personal secrets. The relationship must always have something left unsaid, some mystery, a piece of your own psychic territory – a mystery of male and female hearts. Indeed, there are things that should not be discussed. It is important to speak a language of one another and to understand peculiarities of each other – this is a pledge of warmer relations. This may be the most important labor of  our lives.

A woman always transmits her emotional state to a man and surrounding her people. Women should understand it, and not allow their emotions to emerge. It should be always happy inside. It is often said that a house should smell pies, but the case is not in cakes themselves, but in an emotional state which is transmitted through the cooking process of a woman, through her smile, through her world and her happiness in the house into a man’s heart.

On a stage of understanding our mistakes, which we make with our family and friends – there is a feeling that we must “feel” life as we feel the water when learning to swim.

We must experience water of a conflict and learn to swim in these waters. We need to listen to a heart and it will tell us, — “Yes, a mistake was made herein by me. I applied too much brutal force and emotions…”  – And here I made it right.” It is very important not to deceive oneself at this particular moment. And later, it might be necessary to say of a pure heart: “I love you …”

Your relations will be as you want and dream, if you put into them as much as possible.

We need to cherish our feelings, keep the fire of our love, and then it will be for a long time to warm our hearts and souls.

In a garden of my memories, in a palace of dreams and desires 😉 I always feel happy and grateful and devoted to my friends.

 

 

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elizabeth

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